Enjoying Fall

Last night, we almost missed the sun and we have almost missed fall all together. Somehow, between bouts of sickness, obligations, rain and snow, the leaves have almost disappeared. Bare trees are starting to take over the landscape. I'm so thankful we were able to take a walk along our favorite trail last night and find this gorgeous backdrop.



They gave me lots of goofy grins and a first for me was the closed eyes (she takes after her mother).



I blame the peanut gallery behind me for this one.



These girls truly love each other. I love how they've started not just calling their sister their best friend, but they have also dubbed me their "best" Mommy.



They were quite taken with pointing out all the droppings on the trail. Yep, I reeled them back in quickly after I noticed that.



Looking at the screen, on the back of my camera, failed me a bit this time. I thought I had many more good shots than I actually did. Especially of this little one. I even had her sister sit for me one last time to even things up and make sure she had enough good ones too. Wouldn't you know, only these two turned out for Emily and I got a bunch of Allison. That fairness thing will always be tough I think.



This sweet girl is full of questions. David stayed home to care for all four of us (double ear infections for all kiddos, etc...) that were sick the past 5 days and he said "Does she always ask so many questions?" Yes, and more!

This is one of my favorite shots of the night.



Oh that pouf of pink and those stripe tights. I love it!



Pure Allison. Pure joy. Unless she's upset, then watch out. ;) This girl feels things with her whole body, she is very expressive. She is my little firecracker.









Also a favorite shot of the night. Love the close-up of those chocolate brown eyes. She gets them from her Dad and I love that. I fell in love with David's eyes way back in 7th grade telling my mom he had "puppy dog" eyes.



Thank you for coming on such a fun walk with me last night. And girls, now those tutus are yours to play with anytime you want! No more saving them. :)

Shoe Love and a little skirt talk

In an effort to reinvent myself, into a cool hip Mom, I've been doing some planning, dreaming and shopping lately. My goal is to more closely resemble my pre-baby self. I'll never be a size 4 newlywed again, I have no disillusions about that. But I'd like to trade in my grey t-shirts, sweatshirts, ill-fitting jeans and sloppy comfy shoes that are my usual attire. And losing 25 pounds will go a long way towards not embarrassing myself while sitting on a beach in the Bahamas in just 13 months. Yep, super excited about that one!

So, here's my start...I bought all 6 pairs from 6pm.com at a HUGE discount. I paid just $7.95 each, for all but one pair, and that one was just $5.95. WOW!!! You might want to sign up to receive their newsletter so you don't miss out next time they run a huge sale like this. They have new specials every day.

Here are my new favorite pair of shoes. I heart turquoise. And these happen to go with my favorite Ann Taylor LOFT skirt from about 5-6 years ago. I will wear this next summer, along with the adorable little sleeveless, ruffle neck, turquoise sweater that goes with it, that's a promise to myself.

And the pair I was most worried about came in an adorable box.

It was so cute that I had to google them (love that word) to see what else they make. Um...they've got some really "out-there" shoes. Take a look. I'm surprised they ever designed these. I think their cutest shoes are all over at 6pm.com.

These are actually David's favorite pair. I was skeptical about the ankle ties, but they proved to be quite comfy and they stay on my foot just fine for walking. None of these are the kind of shoes I would plan to have to wear for long stretches of time (well maybe my favorite pair and for good reason which I hope to share with you next spring), but they are all suitable for Church and date nights. Remember...my goal is to trade in my sloppy shoes, so this heel-phobic gal needs to be broken in gently. Don't hold that against me.

Did you see that skirt? It's the perfect color match. This is actually the skirt that I measure all other skirts by. It's a perfect a-line with a little swish when you walk, and enough feminine details to make you wish you were strolling down the streets of Charleston with your Honey. It's by CAbi from a few years ago and I fell in love with it when I saw it on my sister-in-law (she's a consultant). I was pregnant with twins at the time so I had no idea what size to buy. I later found it on eBay. I love that place.

I love these pockets. Sorry, it's a bit wrinkly from being in the back of my closet.

My plan is to copy how it's constructed and make myself a few from my favorite fabrics. Meadowsweet is right up there on my list now too. And this dress WILL be mine, which brings me to my next pair of shoes.

I was looking for orange shoes. Not very conventional I know, but they fill that "Hip Mom" need I have. I adore the pair that Sandy was sporting at Market, but the $239 price tag is just a tad over budget. Ya think? So here was my compromise.

These actually don't fit and somehow I overlooked where it says they have a 4" heel. Yikes! It was the orange I tell ya, it clouded my judgment. But at just $7.95, I had to try it.

I wear a size 7, but as you can see here (please ignore the chipped and outgrown pedi from 2 months ago), these run more like a 7.5. If you or anyone you know wears a size 7.5 and has skinnier/longer toes than me, and wants to look 4" taller, I'm happy to ship them off to you. It will be my gift to you, I would love to see them find a good home. ***The orange shoes have found a home. I hope you enjoy them Morgan!

Just look at the difference in height. My goodness, they would have been dangerous fun!

Here's another LOFT skirt and these cuties will be smashing with it. The white edging across the toes rubs a bit, but maybe I can glue a little felt in there, not sure.

I also bought a couple of basic heels that are sure to go with all those "nothing-goes-with-this" outfits.

I really like the stacked wooden heel...

and the contrast stitching. Not crazy about the little metal jean detail though, especially on the khaki pair. It didn't seem quite so noticeable in the photo on-line. But they are still cute and I'm sure I'll wear them a lot.

I also ordered a pair of yellow polka dot heels that haven't arrived yet. This was another great deal at just $12 (including shipping). I had a hard time choosing between the lime green, orange and yellow. Now I'm wishing I could have bought all three. The $15 coupon I used has expired, but I've had a lot of fun following this blog and this one, for these great deals.

Well, it's been fun dreaming about a sunnier, hipper look, but now it's back to reality, and a gloomy cold day.

Uno

The kids and I visit my Grandma every Friday. We bring her lunch and then spend a couple hours playing at her house. Lately we've been teaching the girls how to play Dominos and Uno.

Every night before we pray with the girls we ask them each what their favorite part of the day was. Last night Allison told David that her favorite part was playing "Uno, dos, tricycles."

I'm still cracking up over that one.

Merry Christmas?

Just 2 weeks ago we were enjoying a backyard BBQ Birthday party for the girls.



Looks like today we'll be building a snowman.



Fall, if you are listening...please come back. We haven't even been to the apple orchard yet.

The space in between

Today is my 35th Birthday.

I knew that last year would be a difficult age to turn (I didn't even mention it here), but I had no idea that this year would be just as hard. So today, I feel the need to put how I feel in writing.



My mother stitched this the year before she died. She was 34. I turned 6 that year. These are the only words I have from her. And, granted, it's likely from a kit, but I still consider them her words. It sits on a shelf in my bedroom and I see it every day. I didn't even know it existed until my parents moved, shortly after I was married, and we were emptying the attic. There, in a dusty old box, was something so much more valuable to me than anything else I could ever own.

I wish it was a ten page letter in her own writing, but it's not. I wondered for years why she didn't write my brother and I letters. Last year I asked my Dad's mom about that (she's got a good memory, he doesn't) and she told me that my mom did ask her to help her do that. Really? Why didn't it happen, or did it? Well, I thought it was better for her if she didn't. It would have been too difficult emotionally for her, so I just didn't encourage it or help her get around to it.

Oh.

I felt like I had gotten the wind knocked out of me. It took me a while to process that. A year later, I think I can finally understand that a bit better. I put myself in her shoes a lot, especially now that I have children of my own. I imagine what it would be like to know that you will never get to see them grow up, get married, have children, know if they are walking with the Lord, know that they are loved. And it's suffocating to think about. I can see how writing a letter would feel somehow...final. Like the good-bye that you would fight with every breath, not to have to make.

So now, when I look at her stitching, I think about her loving fingers that threaded the needle, carefully made each tiny stitch and her gorgeous brown eyes that read this saying over and over and over again (just like I do). I can absolutely say that she is the reason I love sewing so much. She sewed so many beautiful (in a 1970's kind of way) outfits for me and because I wore those in pageants, I have some great professional photos of them. I love knowing that she would be proud of me. That she would ooooh and ahhhh over every little thing I make.

I realize now, that as I turn 35 this year, inside I'm really still just a 6 year old little girl, desperate for her mother's approval and wishing she could come home.

Tomorrow David is taking the kids to the grocery store so they can come home and bake a cake together for my Birthday. They will make handmade cards and I will have all morning to sew.

I sew for me, because I love it.
I sew for my children, so they can feel how much I love them.
I sew because of my mother. Because she can't.