I struggle every day, with discontentment in my heart.
These last few days in particular.
I compare myself, my home (especially my home) and my relationships with those that seem to have it all. It's so easy to do, with so many doors wide open to all the beautiful spaces and people in blogland. I don't have it all together. I'm so far from it, I feel like a fraud most days.
But today, I'm giving myself the ok to get over it. A swift kick actually. Telling myself to knock it off. To not think in terms of five years from now, or in my next house, or when I reach this goal or that goal. To not worry about tomorrow and just focus on today. Today is all we really have.
Today I'm going to see the day the way God wants me to. To be here. To be present in my mind, not just my body. To love fully. To see beauty in everything. Yes, even the spilled cereal all over the carpet. I'm choosing to see instead the cooperation that came in the form of 6 little hands picking it up. Together. I will be quick to think and slow to anger.
I'm going to print out Philipians 4:8 and memorize it.
I'm going to play even before my work is done. Have I ever really done that? I'm going to sit on the bed and snuggle one child at a time, reading them a book. Knowing that there is laundry to be folded. Stitching to be done. Closets to clean out. And floors to be scrubbed.
And then tomorrow, I will get up and do it all over again.